$12 Million Dollar Lottery Winner Plans To Stay At Waitress Job

A waitress in Minneapolis named Ruby said she would keep working her waitress job after recently winning $12 million in the lottery.

Her boss says he is not surprised. He said if you are having fun at work, why change?

Okay, well said, but I can think of 12 million reasons to change.

One week later, her husband nailed an amazing $100 million in the Powerball Lottery. She laughed when I called her and asked if she was going to quit. “Now, Joe, that just shows you don’t know me from a hole in the ground. Of course, I’m going to keep right on working here, silly! These are the people I love.

“Now, I did change my name tag to a solid gold one with my name spelled out in rubies, diamonds and emeralds. It cost me $10 million to get it like I like it, but, hoooowiieeee, Lord, let me tell you, it sparkles like those twinkly lights George puts on our rain gutters at Christmas! But no, I’m not going to change. I’m going to keep on being the same Ruby everybody loves. They love Ruby and I love them because they are like my children. These customers are like my kids. I’ve waited on them so long I’ve seen them grow up and I’ve seen their kids grow up, too. They come in here and eat our eggs and bacon and everything.”

Two weeks later, the couple were notified they were descendants of a Swedish King whose last remaining relative in Sweden died. That meant they were the sole heirs of an estate worth $450 million dollars. Again I asked her if she was going to quit and she laughed it off. “Heck no, Joe, this job is MY LIFE. Now, I don’t actually talk to the customers anymore.

“I sit in the back of the joint in an small 40-story office building I put back there. My office is on the penthouse floor. I have a staff that gets the orders from my dearest customers that love and could never abandon in a million, million years, and then I wave to them from a small digital screen built into that little mtetal menu holder that stores the Splenda and Equal packets. I wave to them and they look kind of confused but some of them are getting up there in years and get confused like.

“Sometimes I see them at the Walmart, for example, and I wave from my Lamborghini Veneno Roadster I picked up used for $4 million. It goes 0-62mph in 2.9 seconds, so I always tell my boss I never have an excuse to be late. Unless its winter. You ever see the winters around here, Joe? Every spring when the snow melts we find 10 or 12 people frozen in place that we wondered what happened to them. Anyway, no I am not going to quit my waitress job. I love it! I love my customers, I love my boss and I love my job!”


About Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel is a keynote speaker, humor writer, and really bad golfer. You can reach him via email at [email protected] as well as Twitter, Facebook, Google+ and LinkedIn.

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