Speaking

5 TED Talks That Show TED Has Jumped The Shark

TED Talks are more popular then ever. Maybe too popular. Here are 5 recent talks that show TED has jumped the shark.

Inspirational Huge Lawn Christmas Decorations – Hightop Ellison shares the secrets of creating the largest, most gawdy Christmas decoration on your lawn every year. He connects Christmas lights to the Illuminati, Duke Elligton, and discount coupons on baked beans.

Don’t Muffle My Harley – As a former Hells Angel, Skip “Little Rascal” Byfort uses motorcycles as a metaphor for growth hacking in the world of tech.

Parking In San Francisco Without Getting Tickets – Captain Billy “Ticket King” Wasabi tells audience members how to avoid high-priced parking tickets in San Francisco. That’s it. Many audience members have been getting upset with Mr. Wasabi’s talk, expecting more. “I thought it was going to be about existentialism and not parking your soul,” said one participant. “It was just about avoiding parking tickets. Thumbs down!”

Phablet Fabulous – Dottie “Tech Diva” Dotterson tells how the new phablets, large phones that are a hybrid of smartphones and tablets allowed her to run her escort service on the go.

Geek Food King – Chef Ted “Rep Tie” Ryers shares his latest recipes targeting geeks and nerds. His latest cookbook, “Food for Programmers,” shows how to serve fast food, junk food and potato chips to programmers on a 72 hour coding binge. “When you have to ship, use these recipes to stay way less than fit,” he said.

There’s a point at which every cool thing become overblown, overcooked and overdone. It’s not a mark of shame. It’s just natural. People want more cool stuff until their desire kills it. These talks show TED is awful close.

Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel is a keynote speaker, humor writer, and really bad golfer. You can reach him via email at [email protected] as well as Twitter, Facebook, Google+ and LinkedIn.

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