7 Things You Heard About LA That Are Total Myths

Many people from the normal part of the United States, meaning outside the limits of Los Angeles County, have many preconceived notions about the city of LA. Today we’re going to examine seven myths about LA.

Dennis Rodman Mayor

Many people believe Dennis Rodman is the mayor of Los Angeles, that he ran for office after leaving basketball and has been leading the town ever since. This is a complete myth.

However, it is true that Dennis Rodman is the mayor of a 40-yard stretch of Hermosa Beach he calls DennisRodmanLand, where he stages a weekly religious ceremony and cookout.

Fame Awaits

A persistent myth about Los Angeles is that movie stars are discovered at the bar at El Coyote restaurant. This is a complete myth.

It is true that many movie stars have discovered the killer margaritas at El Coyote, some never leaving the building ever again.

Uber Pass

A new myth circulating throughout the country is new LA residents are issued a free one-year Uber Pass, allowing them to roam the city any time of day or night for free, much like a Eurail pass.

Not true. But new residents are issued a 12-month Metro Rail pass and bulletproof vest.

Star Next to You

Many people believe that movie stars roam the city, maybe even sitting next to you at one of the famous Hollywood watering holes.

The truth is today’s biggest stars would never take the risk of being seen with the general public. They hire body doubles to stand in for them, take pictures with fans and sign autographs.

Beautiful People

Around the world, people have the perception that Los Angeles is filled with beautiful people. It is true that in this world headquarters for the film, television and entertainment industries, there are a number of attractive people.

But that is only part of it. The truth is you have to be SUPER beautiful to stand out. It’s to the point where really ugly people have ample job opportunities an average beautiful person does not enjoy.

Pharmacology

Some believe that everyone in LA County is on some kind of natural or synthetic pharmaceutical at all times.

While there is a certain amount of abuse going on, the number one recreational drug in LA is narcissism. Many people are on a constant supply of narcissism that alters their personality, rules their lives and eventually leaves them sitting outside a bus station in Las Vegas wondering what happened.

Rock Star

“Welcome to the Jungle,” said Axl Rose in a famous Guns and Roses song. Right now, hordes of young rock hopefuls are streaming into LA from small towns and big cities around the country.

The idea of being discovered and getting a record deal with a major record company is an ongoing myth that needs to be destroyed. These starry eyed hopefuls would have a better chance of recording their own album in their basement in Peoria, putting it up online and building their own tour of laundromats, dry cleaners, hospital waiting rooms and convenience stores.

 


About Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel is a keynote speaker, humor writer, and really bad golfer. You can reach him via email at [email protected] as well as Twitter, Facebook, Google+ and LinkedIn.