Joe

Joe

Los Angeles Comedy Roast – The Roastmaster – Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel is your Los Angeles Roastmaster. A member of the Friars Club, Joe learned the roast game from the pros- the guys that started it all.

Don't give another lame gift this year.

Give a roast! Call 213-804-0105 or email direct at [email protected] with your information- person being roasted, date and number of people in the audience. I'll give you a custom quote for the party you will never forget- a Comedy Roast!

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Joe

Comedian – Southern California

Corporate Entertainment- Joe Ditzel- Southern California Comedian

Joe Ditzel is perfect comedy entertainment for golf your Southern California outing, banquet or convention. As the author of "Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems" Joe will keep your group laughing. Call 213-804-0105 or email [email protected] for booking availability.

Joe has performed for thousands of audiences and looks forward to performing for your Southern California group.

Meet Joe Ditzel

Reviews and Testimonials

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Joe

Finally Played Golf Again

Finally played golf again for the first time in a long time. I had to go to the Airport Post Office so I decided to shoot over to Westchester Golf Course for some late afternoon hacking. I had never seen the three new holes added back in February. The did a really good job. ( http://www.dailybreeze.com/news/ci_14320462 ) . Plus the clubhouse is remodeled. All in all some nice changes.

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Joe

Holiday Entertainment- Joe Ditzel Comedian

Holiday Entertainment- Joe Ditzel- Comedian

Meet Joe Ditzel

Reviews and Testimonials

Joe Ditzel is perfect for entertainment for your company holiday party. Joe is a veteran comedian who has performed thousand of times for corporate events, colleges and private parties. As the author of "Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems" Joe will keep your group in stitches with clean comedy! Call 213-804-0105 or email [email protected] for booking availability.

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Joe

Corporate Entertainment – Joe Ditzel – Technology Comedian

Corporate Entertainment- Joe Ditzel- Technology Comedian

As the author of "Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems With Technology" and "Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems Remembering Technology Jokes" Joe is the perfect speaker for your conference, convention or divisional meeting. Call 213-804-0105 or email [email protected] for booking informartion. 

 

Meet Joe Ditzel

Reviews and Testimonials

 

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Joe

Corporate Entertainment- Joe Ditzel- Golf Comedian

Corporate Entertainment- Joe Ditzel- Golf Comedian

Joe Ditzel is perfect for entertainment for golf outings, banquets and conventions. As the author of "Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems on the Golf Course" and "Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems Remembering Golf Jokes" Joe will keep your group in stitches with his tales of life on the course. A long time hacker and lover of the game, Joe knows golf inside out. Audiences identify with his stories because they have all been there- slashing, hacking and four-putting their way through another broken round.  Call 213-804-0105 or email [email protected] for booking availability.

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Joe has performed for thousands of audiences and looks forward to performing for your group.

Meet Joe Ditzel

Reviews and Testimonials

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Joe

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems on the Golf Course

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems in Los Angeles

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with Relatives

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems Around the House

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with Driving

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems in School

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with Sports

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with His Health

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with Holidays

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with the Media

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with Technology

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with Money

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with Music

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with Relationships

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems at Work

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems at the Store

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems on the Road

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with the Weather

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems in Show Business

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with Crazy People

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with Crazy Golfers

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with Crazy Drivers

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with Crazy Angelenos

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems with Crazy Comedians

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems- Comic

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems- One Panel Cartoons

Joe Ditzel Has Some More Problems


Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems Remembering Jokes

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Joe

Back to Pain

 

I woke up and felt the pain in my back immediately. What am I doing in my sleep that my lower back muscles tighten up like security outside Pamela Anderson’s dressing room?  I get this weird lower back lock every once in a while so it felt familiar. From experience I knew that there was really little I could do – it takes 5 to 14 days to work itself out.  But I went online anyway for a miracle cure and I may have found it- tennis balls:

http://saveyourself.ca/articles/tennis-ball.php

I put a tennis ball on the ground and laid my back on it and rolled around. Wow! It felt great and my back was back in shape in two days.

By the way, what is The Kong Dog Toy? Sounds like a punk band from China.

If you have a bad back, try the tennis ball thing.

And here is an inside secret I developed- take a racquetball with you in the car and lean your back against it.  Instant massage- For 3 bucks at Walmart for a sleeve of 3 racquetballs.

If you really get into this tennis ball massage therapy you might want to make this:

http://www.instructables.com/id/Tennis-Ball-Chair/

Or even this:

http://gizmodo.com/278729/tennis-balls-make-ballsy-benches

Let me know if you do.

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Joe

Joe Ditzel Gift Guide

For my birthday last year, a couple of relatives said to me, “I didn’t know what to get you, so here is a gift certificate.”

To eliminate any doubt about what to get me, I have created the Joe Ditzel Gift Guide. I welcome any of these great gifts:

* Ferrari F355 Spider Convertible- $140,000. If you buy this car for me I’ll thank you with a coupon for a free Jiffy Lube. Every body needs a good Jiffy Lube now and then.

* Tour of American Strip Clubs- forget the Bike Ride Across Iowa or the African Safari for adventure vacations. I want to tour America’s Finest Strip Clubs with a big stack of 20’s.

* I’ll start with the Cheetah III in Atlanta. Round of Golf with Arnold Palmer, Jack Nucleus and Alice Cooper – as a golfer it is my dream to play golf with Arena and Jack. As far as Alice, I want a chance to win back some of the money I spent from my paper route on “School’s Out” and “Billion Dollar Babies” in the 70’s.

* Case of Makers Mark Bourbon- Makers Mark has the greatest ad slogan ever: “Tastes expensive. And is.” Makes Jack Daniel taste like bourbon strained through old socks.

* Hair- my hair is receding from my temples and meeting in the middle, leaving an island of hair in the front. If you look close, you can see Gilligan and the Skipper waving. I look forward to your gift of a case of Rogaine.

* Heidi Klum.

I’ll add to the list as I think of things. However, you do not need to wait until my birthday to send me any of these items.

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