How To Fake Confidence on the Job

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Have you ever met a dimwitted dork at work with one-quarter of your talent who somehow got promoted all the time? They were able to exude confidence even if they only half knew what they were doing. You can pull this off, too — you just have to fake confidence. Here are some tips.

Dress Well

Try wearing a football uniform to work every day. Your message is, “Hey, you have to go through ME to get to the coffee machine.”

Walk Quickly

Confident people are in a hurry to get things done. If you lolly-gag all day, people assume you are ingesting edibles and thinking about the weekend even if it is Monday. Pick up the pace! Try drinking 10 or 12 pots of coffee every morning.

Lower Your Voice

You can fake confidence by lowering your voice. Take it down an octave. Practice by listening to Barry White records. Instead of a chirpy “Good morning!”, say it smooth and slow with the bass tones of low-riding ’64 Impala playing 80s funk.


About Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel is a keynote speaker, humor writer, and really bad golfer. You can reach him via email at [email protected] as well as Twitter, Facebook, Google+ and LinkedIn.