Health

I Died While Carrying Groceries

Courtesy Library of Congress
Courtesy Library of Congress

I walked down to the store to get a few things
Bread, milk and beer enough for a king
But a few things became more and more
Until I was buying out most of the store

I died while carrying bread and milk today
I didn’t have to walk there was another way
My neighbor tried to give me a ride
I walked instead, And then I died

I was fine ’til I tried to carry it all home
Walking in the sun beating down on my dome
I passed out in the street and started to gag
Turned blue and died next to grocery bags

Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel is a keynote speaker, humor writer, and really bad golfer. You can reach him via email at [email protected] as well as Twitter, Facebook, Google+ and LinkedIn.