Crime and Legal

New Company Shoots Down Drones With Golf Balls

Drones have become increasingly popular all over the country. These floating “quad-copters” with cameras are creating tensions everywhere. Neighborhood watch groups and local citizens are outraged about blatant invasion of their privacy. Facebook newsfeeds around the globe are clogged with reports of clashes between drone operators and homeowners.

A small start up in Oceanside, California has a unique solution. Drone Blasters teaches people how to shoot down drones with golf balls. Company president Eber Mendyksen explains, “These drones are wrecking the privacy, security and comfort of Americans everywhere. The drone pilots claim they are flying high above the area, but in truth they are coming in low and peering in windows.

We teach golfers how to shoot them down with golf balls. Some people ask us why not use a gun or other weapon that is more precise. First of all, not everyone owns a gun or a crossbow. However, millions of homeowners have golf clubs in the garage. We teach them how to anticipate the movements of the typical drone and place a five iron shot right in the middle of the machinery. They come down like a duck during hunting season.”

Me. Mendyksen demonstrated in an open field behind company headquarters. An assistant started up a drone and quickly flew it high above the open field. One of the trainers pulled a 6-iron out of his bag, dropped a golf ball on the tarmac and took an easy swing as the drone moved back and forth over the reeds.

He hit the drone with his first shot. The drone did not break in two, however it tilted on its side and made a funny sound as it fell to the earth. Later we looked at the video of the drone. We could see ourselves in the distance and watched as the pro golfer pulled his club and shot it out of the sky.

“This is a new era in home security,” Mr. Mendyksen said excitedly. “As a side benefit, golfers will be able to improve their iron play–as the drone moves in the sky, they will have to be able to shoot low shots, high shots, as well as draws and fades. They are protecting their family while improving their golf game at the same time. It is a revolution in sports and home security.”

Mr. Mendyksen explained the training takes three sessions. The first lesson shows golfers how drones work, how they move in the sky and how to anticipate them with eye tracking and muscle memory exercises.

The second session is at the company’s drone shooting range where dummy drones fly on cables strung across the open field. This allows the drones to move much slower and gives new drone shooters a chance to develop their iron skills.

The third session involves real drones moving at high speed. The golfers are shown how to rely on their instinct, how to relax their bodies, draw on their inner strength and desire to protect their family.

Sales have grown every month for Drone Blasters. Mister Mendyksen is considering opening new locations in a well-known golf communities like Myrtle Beach, Scottsdale, Palm Springs and Hawaii.

“By targeting vacationing golfers,” Mister Mendyksen explained, “We will be able to get our message back to the communities they live in much more efficiently. Once their neighbors find out how easy it is to curb this rising tide of invasion of privacy, they will want to get involved as well. The future is bright for Drone Blasters.”

Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel is a keynote speaker, humor writer, and really bad golfer. You can reach him via email at [email protected] as well as Twitter, Facebook, Google+ and LinkedIn.

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