Sports

Real Men Play Blades

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“Real men play blades”, said John Carling, Sr. as he hit balls at the Studio City Golf Range last week. “All these ‘game improvement’ clubs, hybrids, perimeter-weighting, cavity backs, all of ’em are crap. It’s just the golf industry coming up with new ways to make money. And most people fall for it. Hook, line and sinker!”

Blades are traditional golf clubs that feature a small knife-like head. They were the only club around before “game improvement” clubs like the Ping Eye 2 came into vogue in the 70’s and 80’s.

Carling wore golf gloves on each hand to shield him from the vibration inherent in blades. “That’s feedback!”, he said. “With those damn newer clubs, you can’t feel the ball.” Mr. Carling takes two aspirin every ten minutes to alleviate the bone pain from the feedback he gets. “I don’t even think about it now- it’s a habit. Hey, some athletes take steroids. This is nothing”.

“These are Ben Hogan IPT’s I’ve had since I was 12 years old. My dad took me to Sears for my birthday and I’ve loved them ever since. Dad hated those Pings- called them ‘shovel blades’! , Carling said as he sliced several balls over a high screen fence into neighboring lawns. “They are a little hard to control,” he laughed. “But that’s the idea- it’s like a Ferrari.” Several neighbors began throwing the balls over the fence back at Carling as they yelled and shook their fists.

Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel is a keynote speaker, humor writer, and really bad golfer. You can reach him via email at [email protected] as well as Twitter, Facebook, Google+ and LinkedIn.

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