I don’t mean the Minnesota Vikings. We are talking about the original Vikings, the ones who landed in North America 500 years before Columbus. By the time Mr. Columbus showed up, there was a sign on the beach that said, “Sorry, Pal, we got you by 5 centuries. Enjoy the turkey dinners.”
When a Viking died, they often put them in a ship with their jewelry and clothes, set the ship on fire and sent it out to sea. My family couldn’t afford that. The best they’ll probably do is push me out on a Sunfish sailboat with a still-burning Coleman stove they last used at a family picnic that afternoon.
Vikings loved to ski, picking up the sport thousands of years ago. They loved it so much they created their own skiing god. Vikings were as feared on the slopes as they were on flat land–if you cut it front of one in the lift line, they would stab you in the heart with their horned helmet.
The Vikings lived in “long houses,” built to retain heat through the use of turf on the roof. This worked well until it came time to mow the roof. Even if they could get the lawnmower up there, many times the Viking and his mower fell off the roof and died. Then they put the man and mower on a ship, burned it and sent it out to sea.