Facebook recently removed the “feeling fat” status from their platform. For those unaware, the status was one selection of several available from a pull-down menu. Some people said this status was a form of fat-shaming.
Frankly, I’m glad it’s gone. That means there is now room for some new status updates I would actually use.
Feeling Like I Want To Jump Up and Get My Own Coffee
I’ll use this when the waitress blows me off when I want some more coffee, despite trying to wave her down with orange road signs.
Feeling Like I Don’t Want To Take Any More Fiber Supplements
Is it really necessary to take a separate pill to make sure you get enough fiber?
Feeling Like I Shouldn’t Be Eating Peanut Butter Out of A Jar
Peanut butter is one of life’s joys. But I really shouldn’t eat it out of the jar with a spoon.
Feeling Like You Should Quit Texting and Actually Call Me
For the love of all that is good and holy: Quit texting me. Just call. Or even better send me an email I can read at my leisure.
Feeling Like You Should Pick Up Your Dog’s Doo-doo
Dear downtown resident and dog-owner. We don’t live in the country, and we all have to use these sidewalks. Can you grab a plastic bag on your way out the door with Fido next time and actually pick up their doo-doo? That way I don’t have to be on alert like a Marine checking for land mines.
Feeling Like You Should Pick Up The Pace When Walking in the Crosswalk in Front Of Me
Hey, I do plenty of walking so I know the hassles you are going through. But surely you can pick up the pace when cars are waiting for you to cross at the crosswalk? Drop the laid-back saunter and put a little pep in your step.