3 Dying Professions You Should Make Sure You Never Talk To Your School Guidance Counselor About Ever, Ever, Ever

These careers and industries are marked for death. Don’t blame me if you go down this road.

Iceland Beach Lifeguard

I get it. You see yourself saving lives on the beaches of Iceland, heroically pulling in stranded swimmers as the music swells. But the number of beach lifeguards in Iceland has dropped from a high of 3 in 1986 down to a single young woman in 2018. When she goes back to college, the industry will shut down.

Mafia Bookkeeper

Always wanted to keep the books for the mafia, carefully tracking income from loansharking, gambling and Pokemon cards? Artificial intelligence is taking away your dream. Maybe use your skill in writing very small, legible letters and numbers to start a “personalized font service.”

Hockey Disk Jockey

When you were a kid, you made your dad play ONLY songs related to hockey, like The Beatle’s song, “I Got No Teeth So I Don’t Eat Corn” and “Swinging and Fighting in Sheboygan.”

As you got older, you found your niche: a disk jockey playing nothing but the hockey-themed songs of your youth. But streaming services are wiping DJs off the map. How about starting a party-DJ service playing hockey songs?