5 Memphis public colleges that will make you rich, or at least make you a manager at Zaxby’s
Mid-South Institute of Hustle & Applied Grill Skills (MSIHAGS)
Founded in the parking lot of a shuttered TGI Friday’s and now operating out of the second floor of a vape shop, MSIHAGS offers an Entrepreneurial BBQ Sciences degree that boasts 94% job placement—most students open a food truck by week three. The ROI here is phenomenal: students make their tuition money back selling pulled pork egg rolls before midterms.
Graduates have gone on to launch empires such as “Q and You?” and “Grill ‘n’ Spill,” Memphis’ first BBQ-themed escape room. The school’s motto? “No dorms. No debt. All meat.”
University of Greater Memphis-Adjacent Technology (UGMATech)
Technically located in Olive Branch, Mississippi, but marketing itself as “Memphis’ Innovation Back Porch,” UGMATech is a public school funded entirely by cryptocurrency and Bass Pro Shop dividends. Their flagship program, Drone-Based Truck Repair, is considered revolutionary and illegal in 13 states.
Graduates reportedly earn six figures doing freelance alternator replacements while flying DJI drones from their bedroom window. ROI metrics spiked after one grad repaired a FedEx truck mid-delivery and was awarded a lifetime supply of shipping peanuts.
Memphis State for Bargain Psychology and Social Media Therapy (MeSBaPSoMeT)
MeSBaPSoMeT students study online and in-person at select booths inside Denny’s restaurants between the hours of 11pm and sunrise. The curriculum focuses on the intersection of TikTok therapy and Southern passive aggression. Capstone projects include creating an Instagram Reel that convinces your aunt to stop giving unsolicited parenting advice.
The ROI is unbeatable: students go viral, monetize their trauma by semester two, and have at least one collab offer from a ghost kitchen by graduation.
South Bluff Institute of Logistics and Vibe Management (SBILVM)
Nestled inside a former roller skating rink, SBILVM is known for producing Memphis’ finest vibe consultants, a lucrative career field no one fully understands. With classes like “Candle Scent Marketing” and “FedEx as a State of Mind,” students learn how to harness Memphis’ unique energy to optimize workplace chill.
The ROI here isn’t money so much as “vibe equity,” which can be traded for rooftop DJ gigs, free wings, and the elusive title of Brand Ambassador for local sock companies. Graduates claim to be “rich in ways that can’t be measured by tax forms.”
Tennessee Public College of Strategic Bluffing and Freelance Economics (TPCSBFLE)
Located across from a suspiciously quiet Dollar General, this institution teaches students the fine art of faking it ‘til you make it. Core classes include Confident Lying, Freelance Invoicing for Services You Didn’t Render, and Venmo Memo Management.
Their financial aid office accepts payment in the form of crypto, Memphis Grizzlies tickets, or homemade candles. Graduates often start as “consultants,” transition to “executive brand storytellers,” and eventually land jobs where nobody knows what they do—but they own a blazer.
