5 Texas Inventions That Give Life Meaning
How dreary would your life be without these Texas inventions?
Handheld Calculator
Before the handheld calculator, engineering majors carried giant 7-foot long abacuses with rods the size of shower curtains. It took two students to carry one abacus to class and they had to share it while doing homework. One would work on a problem while the other leafed through the Sears Catalog looking at bra ads.
Stadium Nachos
Stadium nachos were invented at a Texas Rangers game in 1976. And no wonder–the seventies were a time of discord, where society was in flux and no one knew what was a good idea or bad one. This is a perfect example: “cheese” food gooped on to soggy nachos through a hand-sanitizer pump.
Liquid Paper
Liquid Paper was invented in the 1950s by Bette Nesmith Grahamas a way to fix her mistakes. First she used it to fix typing errors. It worked so well she might have used it to remove every other mistake she had in life, from relationships that didn’t work out to nosy neighbors with yappy dogs.
Whole Foods
What better invention than a store featuring wholesome, real food and attentive, knowledgeable salespeople? Whole Foods was invented in Texas and all went well until it was sold to a giant conglomerate. In three years, expect the Whole Foods name to be replaced by the new name – Fast and Tasteless Foods Sold By Harried Workers.
Fritos
Fritos are a little like stadium nachos, just curlier and with more salt. They were invented in 1932 as a snack for baseball fans watching the Texas Terribles who had a lifetime winning record of 3 wins-17115 losses.
Dr. Pepper
Dr. Pepper was invented by Charles Alderton in Waco in 1885. The problem is no one really knows what the 23 “secret flavors” are. And who is the mysterious Dr. Pepper? On rumor says Dr. Pepper juiced players on his local high school football team by putting Dr. Pepper in the team water bottles before each game. There is no record of it improving their performance, but fans noticed missing players were often in the restroom when they should have been on the field.
