Travel and Places

5 worst car dealerships in Omaha

In this video we’re going to talk about five of the worst car dealers in Omaha.

Omaha is the feature city this week. We’ve been talking about different aspects of Omaha, and one of the things we like to do is get down into the nooks and crannies, the streets and avenues and look at some of the worst businesses in town – businesses that you want to avoid if you want a square deal and good, attentive service.

These are the five worst car dealers. Let’s go through them and you’ll get what I mean as we go along.

Tryout Car Dealer

The first one on the list is Tryout car dealer.

Tryout Cars is downtown right along the Missouri River’s edge.

Tryout Cars! It sounds good because they say in their commercials, “Try out the car you want! Take the car you love for a month and give it a spin!”

The problem is people take them up on their offer.

They say, “Okay I’ll take it for a month.” And after two weeks the dealer steals the car back.

The customer says, “Hey, wait a minute. You said I could try it out for a month.”

The Tryout guys say, “Sue us!” They have a very strong legal team. They look for a loophole – say you were mistreating the car. They comb the 18-page form they make you attest with your signature that you’ve read all the pages.

It says if you drive over 35 miles per hour that’s considered abuse of the vehicle and they can come and pick up it up at any time.

Even though it’s Omaha and there are plenty of people who drive at 20 miles per hour — top speed —  in a city of that size the average travel rate on the open freeway has to be over 70!

Clearly anybody getting a car from Tryout is going to lose and have that car taken away from them.

There goes your deposit. There goes everything.

Make sure you read each paragraph of those 18 pages.

Better still, just avoid Tryout Cars.

Groundswell Cars

Number two is Groundswell.

It’s not the typical name of a car dealer.

Groundswell Cars.

It’s an older dealership. Years ago, 1938 or 1939, they had the idea the community would be extremely excited to have a new car dealer in town.  A groundswell.

A groundswell of excitement in town — everybody would come out and get their new cars! A new juggernaut is born.

Well, that was the idea.

The only problem is the dealership is so old, I’m talking about the physical building then if they haven’t had so much groundswell as they’ve had down pour

and that’s every time it rains

the basement fills with water and it comes up into the dealer asharam area

so you can be standing in a foot and half of water as you talk to a salesperson about a building

so if you come in and there’s a saleswoman there and she’s standing in the in the lagoon and you wait over and you’re soaking wet

now Tierney’s then you say yeah I’m interested in looking at the new Buick

and he writes an American car dealership of new Buick perhaps it new Chevy and they open the car door and then the water starts to flow into the cars themselves

I mean guys it’s just you think

well they’ll fix it right and they say that I’ve called them I’ve talked to them and they say they’re gonna fix it but they never fix it

so I’m gonna say avoid groundswell right here right there in Omaha.

Jaywalker Cars

now the third one on our list of five this is this is a place called Jaywalker Cars.

now he walked cars was a dealership that also has a long history in town

but it goes even further bad guys like to the 1920s and in those days a jaywalker had a different connotation

it wasn’t a somebody jaywalking across the road

kay Walker was sort of an upbeat an upbeat chap and upbeat lady a positive

they they had gone a jaywalker cuz they can’t they had kind of a swag to their walk

they walk like a chamber cocky the walk almost almost too confident

but really it was in a positive vein of being upbeat and positive so that was the moniker for the car dealership

well what Apple was over telling me of these salespeople took it to the extreme it’s hurt the 30s the 40s they wanted to be the King jaywalker right the King J

and so they would come up with more and more outlandish lies to get you into a car

and it’s really good the FTC and the Transportation Department put a kibosh on that in the 50s

but once again if you know it’s hard to erase the personality of a car dealership you just can’t do it especially because it’s family-owned

some of the younger some of the young bucks said the family started getting it back into the business after the FTC kind of shut him down there in the early fifties and by the 60s and 70s they were all cocked young kids again

so if you look here’s the thing maybe you’re different

maybe you don’t mind a car dealer lying to you and coming up with the most outlandish lies like it with every new car purchase you’re gonna throw in a new Christmas tree right and it’s the middle of July

well they know you’re gonna forget about it

try driving by there and December around ten and say hey man I’m here for my Christmas tree and they’re like what

yell Dave well dave told me I can get afree Christmas tree with a cantor purchaser

like Dave doesn’t work here dude get off the lot

so it’s just too much trouble guys I’m gonna say avoid Jay Walker Jay Walker car dealership right there in Omaha

Announce Motors

now number four is an ounce

now announces also what are these I think it’s a Midwestern fig where they have these sort of positive vibes you know

and announce when they would sell a car and an ounce this is how they do it: when they sell a car they make an announcement over the intercom

attention then people of Omaha please betray together for the new car purchase of miss Lori centers from ski from South Omaha

and then the entire theorems Gilligan like I keep me you remember uh chi Chi’s where they used to do the happy birthday happy happy birthday and all the waiters and waitresses would come over

well this is the same way the old dealership would be like yeah and applaud a whistle and then balloons would fly in the air

well they start a bad way bad guys way back in the early part of the other century the previous century

so you know it’s information a lot of people in Omaha they can remember their grandparents buying cars they’re little kids and the balloons that flythe place of cheer

well that’s great and it’s kind of a fun that tradition right that they’ve had forever

but the problem now is that they have been decreed by the government that they have to announce all transactions. I can’t just announce sales.

so now when people bring in their car for service and they get an oil change they announced that ladies and gentlemen Baba please recognize from North Omaha mr. bill Trevor of the musky who just got oil change in his 2017 Buick LeSabrerigh

it would go and I’m not talking about just grab the dealership this said this is a bold horn they went over the entire city

so now you’re you have your Starbucks out of the nice day in the summer you’re on the patio of the Starbucks, his announcement comes over and ruins your coffee

so guys I mean it’s too much

I don’t need them a note saying every time I get in the will change over there

Bushel Car Sales

and now car dealership and number five on our list of dealerships the five worst car dealerships in Omaha guys is bushel bushel car special cars

and their commercials tell you that if you come on down and buy a new vehicle they’re gonna throw in in the trunk of the car five bushels of corn fresh farm vegetables

five bushels

not one not two not three not five bushels of corn and fresh farm vegetables calm down folks Oh guys what happens if you get him little sports car okay you buy a little little convertible right on the yangtze used car line we’re going to put all those muscles you’re gonna have to sit on one of the bushes to get your car oh okay I don’t want to be sitting on a bushel of corn in the scene of my new car I can barely reach the pedals and I can barely reach this dick shift I get better they reach the clutch and you got ears of corn that are drying it into my buttocks that would be horrible so guys that’s going to be a big no to find bushels of corn and farm-fresh vegetables in the trunk of the car I don’t need all that just donated in my name to the local food bank that’s what I say so guys those are the five worst car dealers in Omaha hey what do you think you know of some other car dealer that we should be aware of let us know in the comments and I just remember folks I made all this up off the top of my head so please don’t use this information for your report at work you’ll get fired for your application or Harbor you’ll never get in or for your senior thesis they’re going to keep you out of school

Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel is a keynote speaker, humor writer, and really bad golfer. You can reach him via email at jditzel@yahoo.com as well as Twitter, Facebook, Google+ and LinkedIn.