Sports

Things I think about when looking for my lost golf ball

How is it that I find every remote thicket of woods on this course?

I’ll never find my ball back in here.

Heck, they’ll never find ME back in here. 5 years from now some poor sap will snap-hook his drive and come stomping back in here to find my skeleton clutching a 7-iron.

This is like Lord of the Rings meets the Blair Witch project.

Why can’t I hit a straight tee shot? It’s baffling. No wonder I buy Pinnacles at Walmart. The range ball Pinnacles.

Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel is a keynote speaker, humor writer, and really bad golfer. You can reach him via email at jditzel@yahoo.com as well as Twitter, Facebook, Google+ and LinkedIn.