Area Man Rushes To Buy “Fifty Shades: The Early Years”

Aibaan Oivelo of Winterhurst rushed down to the local Barnes and Noble the minute his favorite AM station reported that the latest Fifty Shades book was in stores.

“Fifty Shades: The Early Years” gives fans a clear picture of the life events that shaped Christian’s success as well as his particular entertainment needs.

“I couldn’t wait to read it,” said the professor and ship-in-a-bottle enthusiast. “I crouched down outside the store and devoured it in 20 minutes. All I can say is wow!”

“I practically led this guy’s life,” Mr. Oivelo explained. “I mean, it’s like reading my diary. Well, I’m not super successful and I haven’t had a date in years. But other than that, we might as well be twins.”