Uh, Please Don’t Lick My Fast Food Order
This photo of a Taco Bell employee licking taco shells could be a prank. Or not.
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Joe Ditzel
Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems
Food and Restaurants
The Coffee Machine Shaped Like A Race Car Engine
For you coffee lovers that need to get really revved up.
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Chorizo and Rice and Beans
I like most of the restaurants in the neighborhood. They are all pretty good–and cheap. There’s one across the street. Nicaraguan and Salvadoran food. It’s always busy.
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Crazy People At The Store: Overzealous Mopping Guy
Hello, Overzealous Mopping Guy! I really do appreciate your enthusiasm in cleaning the dining room of the fast food restaurant.
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Planet Guilt
Planet Hollywood is having some financial problems lately. Despite these setbacks, there is news of more theme restaurants. Here are some of the new exciting restaurants soon to be built near you:
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Cookie
Today is the day! The Girl Scout Cookies are here! I get my cookies from coworkers. Last year they didn’t arrive until around 330pm. I didn’t eat lunch that day. I was so hungry I ate a whole box of samoas. My body started to shake. I walked around like Beavis with my shirt over my head muttering “more samoas”. I had to leave work and lie down for 35 days.
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I’ll Pay For Your Groceries
I was at the Downtown Ralph’s near Staples buying some bananas and an orange. I set them on the converyor belt with a plastic divider separating my stuff from the guy in front of me. Suddenly a guy walked up and pointed at the fruit and said, “I can do it. I’ll buy your stuff and put it on my card and you just give me cash. It’ll be faster.” I heard what he said but it made no sense to me. I told him no, I didn’t want to do that.
When I got home I was still trying to figure it out. I found the answer with a little googling. Does this work? Has it it ever happened to you?
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Hmmmmmmm! Chicken Feet!
Now, that’s real Chinese food– for only two bucks you get a big bowl of chicken feet at Hop Kee Seafood in Arcadia, California. It’s actually not bad but it’s messy because you have to spit out the bones. I’ll admit I only had one. Hey, where are the goose beaks?
Starbucks Kids
Note to the guy who brought his three year old to Starbucks and is trying to force the kid to eat some eggs: please don’t bring your kids to Starbucks and yell at him 5 feet from my head. That’s what Chuck E. Cheese is for.
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Wahoo’s Fish Taco Employee Asks If Everything is Alright
“Is everything alright?” Culver City resident Barry Kirko was asked seconds after being served his Banzai Bowl with Chicken and Black Beans. Kirko had yet to put a forkful of the delicious meal in his mouth. “Great!” he said, resting his hand on the table top.
Leaning his head back for a sip of his Sobe Green Tea, another cheerful employee asked Kirko, “Is everything alright?” Kirko spilled a little of the elixir as he said “Yes. Very good.”
Kirko had killed off three forkfuls of rice and beans when a manager approached. “Is everything alright?”, he asked in an upbeat tone. “Yes, sir!” Kirko intoned as he made a mock salute.
Four hours later Kirko headed for the door. “Was everything alright?” the night crew called after him. Kirko waved as the door swung shut behind him.
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Porcelain Springs
"Hey, don’t drink that," my friend said as I filled a glass from the kitchen tap. "Our water is disgusting. Here, you can have this," she said as she handed me a bottle of Evian from the fridge.
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Never Been Butter
When I go to the grocery store I am interested in one thing- getting out. I want to race through and hit the road. It never happens. Yesterday I went to the frozen pizza case. Gone. Not the pizzas. The whole frozen food section.
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