Endangered Species: Middle Kids

Are you a middle kid? Enjoy it. You are an endangered species. The average number of children in a family is now two. Back in the 70s, mothers had four kids on average.

In other words, as a middle kid, you are the last of a dying breed. In the city, in the country, in the suburbs, in the wild hinterlands, middle kids are becoming extinct.

Will history remember you and me? That’s right, I’m a middle kid, too.

Chances are we will be forgotten. Because we were always forgotten. Lost in the shuffle. How many times did your parents drive away and only realize they forgot you after they had cover 45 miles of highway. Oh, just me? Sure.

I can hear all you older and younger types laughing. “The middle kid is disappearing! Haha!”

But before you guffaw with gusto, consider what the world is losing when us middle kids are no more. Middle kids have talents that are not easy to find. They are:

• Great negotiators. How many fights, scuffles and disagreements were solved by the middle kid diplomat in your family? Lots. When we lose these junior negotiators to evolution, the world will need to rely on the conviction of the eldest or the emotions of the youngest to negotiate tricky family problems. It will never work as well.
• Excellent performers. The stage, screen and music studios of the world are filled with middle kids who began performing early in an attempt to stand out, to escape the bland world of middledom where they are never called on or recognized. Do you want to go to a speech where an older kid talks about how great they are, or a youngest kid tells tales of their social media prowess. Yawn. Middle kids know how to put on a show.
• Creative risk takers. Every significant innovation in history was put forward by a middle kid. There is a ton of research on this, none of which I have handy. But it makes sense–middle kids look at the world differently than normal children, so they are able to formulate new ideas and approaches that lead to technological breakthroughs. Combine that with their hunger for attention, middle kids are not afraid to take big risks for a perceived payout later–like getting Father or Mother to actually remember their name.

Middle kids, the game is up. It was fun while it lasted.