How Indianapolis saved itself from extinction
In the earliest days of Indianapolis, the town council faced a peculiar predicament. The population was dwindling, and young couples were moving elsewhere, enticed by the allure of big cities. The town was on the verge of becoming a mere footnote in history. The council knew they had to concoct a wild scheme to encourage couples to settle down and have babies. After weeks of brainstorming, Mayor Baxter had an epiphane-lips… I mean, epiphany!
“Why not capitalize on our greatest asset?” Mayor Baxter exclaimed during one of their meetings. “Our name! Let’s turn Indianapolis into… Indianapolips!”
There were gasps, murmurs, and some snickers. “Are you suggesting we change our beloved town’s name just to promote childbearing?” Councilman Grimes asked, eyebrows raised.
“Exactly!” Mayor Baxter beamed, “It’s fun, it’s catchy, and it emphasizes the ‘lips’ – a symbol of love and affection. We could hold a ‘Kiss in the Park’ event. Couples who participate and pledge to start a family in Indianapolis would get perks like free land, tax breaks, and, for the cherry on top, a giant tube of chapstick.”
It took a moment, but eventually, the council warmed up to the idea. They launched a massive campaign showcasing couples kissing under the banner of “Indianapolips: The Town That Puckers Up!” Billboards featured images of cherubic babies and puckered lips, and local radio jingles had the town humming along.
The ‘Kiss in the Park’ event was an enormous success. Hundreds of couples gathered at the town center, pledging their love and commitment to starting families in Indianapolis, or rather, Indianapolips. The free chapstick tubes became collectibles, with some swearing they held magical properties that boosted romance.
Against all odds, the campaign worked. The population of Indianapolis started booming. Children ran through the streets, parks were filled with the laughter of little ones, and schools were bustling. The unique promotional strategy even caught the attention of nearby towns, which began considering name changes like “Kissington” and “Smoochville.”
As years went by, the name “Indianapolips” became an endearing term of the past. While the official name reverted back to “Indianapolis,” the legend of that audacious campaign lived on. It became a tale told with pride to every new generation, a reminder of the time when the town puckered up and changed its fate.
