Moose Stomps Robotic Lawn Mower

A robot lawnmower surprised a moose. It didn’t turn out well for the robot.

A moose stomps a robotic lawn mower? What the heck is going on? Yes, a moose gets surprised by a robotic lawn mower–like a Roomba for your grass. I didn’t even know they existed.

What does he do? He stomps on it!

See, moose are primarily docile and slow moving. Until they’re pissed. Then they use all 800 to 1,500 pounds of their massive body to stomp and kick. If you’ve ever been kicked by a horse, you know how much that hurts.

Here’s the weird thing: a moose can not only kick behind him like a horse—they can kick in
front and to the sides. A moose can kick you from every direction!

“Come at me bro! I’m gonna kick you no matter where you come from!”

And you don’t know what’s gonna piss him off. Sometimes their feeding grounds get barren and that makes him mad. That makes him angry. There’s not enough food.

There was a guy in Alaska a few years ago—an 85 year old guy—who surprised a moose out of the blue and the moose charged him. He had to dive into a snowbank to save his life. His wife beat the moose away with a shovel. She’s five feet tall and 82 years old— she scared away a moose!

That was pure adrenaline and, let’s be honest, some luck.

Moose are amazing. Every winter males shed their antlers and in the spring they get new antlers, which only take three to five months to grow. Those giant moose antlers are one of the fastest growing organs in all of the animal kingdom. They’re just amazing animals.

But if they are castrated by chemical means or by an accident in nature they lose their antlers immediately. The next time they grow back they are deformed and ugly and they never ever shed them again.

That would piss you off—the deformed antlers for sure–and castration wouldn’t make you happy either.

Be careful. The first sign of aggression for a moose is eye contact. If a moose makes
eye contact with you, get ready for a kicking festival because that moose is about to kick your ass.

But it brings up the question: Why is a moose even being approached by a robotic lawn mower? Robotic lawn mowers work inside an invisible fence—they should never leave the grounds they’re on.

So what happened?

A jailbreak, that’s what happened. The robotic lawn mower said, “Enough of this, I’ve been mowing this same damn lawn every day for two years. I’m making a break for it!” Somehow he broke the perimeter and got out.

Unfortunately for him, he met an ass-kicking moose. I think today’s lesson is if you’re a moose, look out for robotic lawn mowers. If you’re a robotic lawn mower approaching a moose, get ready to get stomped.