Puppy Reflects On Huge Gambling Losses

Although he’s only been alive a few weeks, this puppy has racked up impressive wins at the poker table at the most prestigious rooms in Sin City. He has uncanny instincts and a lot of patience. Playing to the crowd, he often calls for another card by turning his head slightly as if listening for some far off sound.

Despite his victories, “Tilt” as he has been branded by the old timers due to his signature head move, racked up $8,489,727 losses over the weekend. “He feels bad about it,” said his owner John Mydogbetsbigistan. “Early on I taught him to deal, bet and take losses like an adult dog.”

“At this point, he is asking himself the big questions: Can he hang with the younger crowd anymore? Has the game passed him by? Is it time to get a job in insurance sales?” said the owner.