12 coffee shop frustrations that make me want to drink tea
Of course you need your coffee fix. I’m right there with you. But first you to face these frustrations.
- Name Game: No matter how simple your name is, there’s a good chance it’ll be misspelled on the cup. John becomes “Jon”, Sarah becomes “Sara”, and don’t even get started on names like Siobhan or Geoff.
- Size Matters: A “tall” is small, and you need to know Italian to order the largest size.
- Customization Overload: There’s a fine line between a customized coffee and a science experiment. “I’d like a half-caf, soy, one-pump vanilla, two-pump caramel, iced but not too cold, shaken, no whip latte, please.”
- Temperature Precision: “I’d like my coffee at exactly 185°F.” It’s a coffee shop, not a laboratory, but precision is key for some.
- The Waiting Dance: Everyone does that subtle, awkward dance near the counter while waiting for their drink, pretending not to hope that every cup is theirs.
- The Forgotten Drip Coffee: Amidst the fancy lattes and frappuccinos, the plain drip coffee sits in the corner, waiting for someone to remember its simple charm.
- Loyalty Cards: You’ll always find that loyalty card when you don’t need it, but the moment you’re about to get that free coffee… it’s vanished.
- The Wi-Fi Ritual: Half the people seem to be there more for the Wi-Fi than the coffee. And there’s always that one person troubleshooting their connection with the barista.
- Milk Mystery: There are now more milk and milk substitute options than coffee bean types. Oat, almond, soy, coconut, macadamia… and the list goes on.
- Price Paradox: We’ll often hesitate to buy a $1.50 apple because it’s “too expensive”, but won’t think twice about that $5 latte.
- Ambient Confusion: The ambient noise level is either “whisper in a library” or “rock concert”, with no in-between.
- Reusable Cup Dilemma: You want to save the environment, but you also don’t want to be that person holding up the line because you forgot to pre-wash your reusable cup.
