5 worst dental offices in Omaha
In Omaha, a city usually known for its friendly smiles, there exist a few dental practices that might make those smiles a bit harder to maintain. Let’s explore the five dental offices that have become infamous for their unique approaches to oral healthcare.
1. Drill & Fill Extravaganzas – Downtown Where Anesthesia is Optional
Dentist’s Pitch: “At Drill & Fill in Downtown Omaha, we believe in the natural strength of the human spirit – and of the human jaw. Anesthesia is available, but we encourage patients to embrace the experience.”
Patient’s Groan: “I came in for a cleaning, left feeling like I’d survived a medieval torture session.”
In the bustling heart of Downtown, Drill & Fill Extravaganzas offers a ‘back-to-basics’ approach, reminiscent of a time when dental anesthesia was nothing more than a swig of whiskey and a strong grip on the chair.
2. Cavity City – Midtown Preventative Care? Never Heard of It
Dentist’s Pitch: “Here in Midtown’s Cavity City, we focus on the now! Why worry about tomorrow’s cavities when today’s are so interesting?”
Patient’s Sigh: “Asked about getting a regular cleaning, and they looked at me like I was speaking a foreign language.”
Midtown’s Cavity City seems to have misunderstood the concept of preventive care. The focus is solely on existing problems, with little thought given to future oral health.
3. The Extractor’s Emporium – Benson We Love to Pull Teeth
Dentist’s Pitch: “In Benson, we at The Extractor’s Emporium see extraction as an art form. Why bother saving a tooth when you can create a masterpiece of gaps?”
Patient’s Moan: “I went in with a slight toothache, came out missing two molars. I think they’re a bit too enthusiastic.”
Benson’s The Extractor’s Emporium is notorious for its love of extraction. Here, the solution to most dental issues seems to be pulling teeth – whether or not that’s actually necessary.
4. Braces Bonanza – West Omaha Where Orthodontics is a Wild Guess
Dentist’s Pitch: “At Braces Bonanza in West Omaha, we see orthodontics as a journey of discovery. We’re not quite sure where we’ll end up, but we promise it’ll be interesting!”
Patient’s Grumble: “My braces were supposed to be off in two years. It’s year four, and I’m starting to think they’re permanent accessories.”
In West Omaha, Braces Bonanza approaches orthodontics with a sense of unpredictability. Treatment plans seem to be made up on the spot, with end dates being more aspirational than actual.
5. The Molar Bear Clinic – South Omaha Kids’ Dentistry with a Side of Nightmares
Dentist’s Pitch: “At Molar Bear Clinic in South Omaha, we make kids’ dentistry fun! Our mascot, the Molar Bear, loves to make surprise visits to the little ones!”
Parent’s Shudder: “The Molar Bear mascot is terrifying. My kid now associates clean teeth with being chased by a giant tooth with legs.”
South Omaha’s Molar Bear Clinic attempts to make dental visits fun for kids with their mascot, the Molar Bear. Unfortunately, this mascot seems to have the opposite effect, instilling a lifelong fear of dental hygiene in the younger generation.
In Omaha, these dental offices stand out. These five offices have taken a different path, leaving a trail of bewildered and slightly less toothy patients in their wake.
