Freedom fighters on the front lines

Folks, our freedom is in the balance. Fortunately, there are people fighting on the front lines to try to bring sanity back. For example:

– In Tampa Bay, Sam R., a 275-pound 47-year-old accountant challenged skinny, pimple-faced 16-year-old coffee barista Dudley to a boxing match “anywhere you want to meet, bro” after Dudley asked him to wear a mask in the coffee shop.

– In Kansas City, 35-year-old freedom fighter Jenny H. challenged 82-year-old “greeter” Sam to a no-holds-barred cage match in the Octagon after Sam prevented her entering his store without a mask.

– In Peoria, 41 year-old Perry S. was asked to wear a mask while shopping in the store. He jumped up on a nearby coin-operated kiddie horse ride machine near the entrance and yelled at shoppers, “Fight and you may die. Run and you will live at least awhile. And dying in your bed many years from now, would you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that for one chance, just one chance to come back here as young men and tell our enemies that they may take our lives but they will never make us wear a mask!”

Sure, we won two world wars partly because Americans sacrificed their personal comfort for the greater good of all. But masks are itchy, my friend, even those ones that make it look like you are smiling. Kudos to these brave souls taking on baristas, greeters and fast-food serving tyrants making minimum wage across this great land.