Jeremy rents a bike at the beach

Jeremy sucked in his gut as he walked into the bike shop. He was going to rent a bike in order to scope out the beautiful women roller-blading down the Strand. Maybe he would meet one.

“Hi, how much to rent a bike?” he wheezed.

“It’s $15 an hour,” Cassie, the attendant said. “You don’t have to hold in your gut, sir. We make you sign a release that we are not responsible if you don’t meet any women today. That’s all on you.”

“Well, of course,” Jeremy protested. “Who would ever think a sweet bike like this one here would help my chances? I mean, come on,” he chuckled nervously. Cassie rolled her eyes, thinking that Jeremy was just another sleazy guy trying to pick up women. But she decided to play along, knowing that it was her job to give good customer service.

“Sure thing, sir,” Cassie said with a grin. “Just sign here, and you’re ready to go.”

Jeremy signed the waiver and took the bike. As he rode down the Strand, he saw a group of women ahead of him. They were all wearing tight, colorful spandex outfits and rollerblading in and out of the crowded walk.

Jeremy pedaled faster. He saw a woman break away from the pack and come towards him. She had long brown hair, sparkling green eyes, and a smile that could light up the entire beach.

“Hey there, handsome,” the woman said, slowing down to ride alongside Jeremy. “What brings you out here today?”

Jeremy was momentarily speechless. “Oh, uh,I like the beach air. Good for keeping a clear head when I lift weights down at the Beach Gym,” he lied. “How about you?”

“I’m a pilot. Here on a layover. Private helicopters. A rich guy owns them. Ever fly in a helicopter?” Jeremy’s eyes widened in surprise. He had never met anyone who flew in a private helicopter before.

“No, I haven’t,” he said. “That must be pretty cool.”

“It’s amazing,” the woman said. “But, I have to say, riding alongside a handsome man on a bike is a pretty great way to spend the day too.”

Jeremy felt his cheeks flush.

“Would you like to grab a drink later?” Jeremy asked, trying to sound casual.

“I thought you’d never ask,” the woman said, grinning. “Meet me at the bar on Pier 6 at seven.”

Later that night, Jeremy smelled his wrist to make sure his cologne wasn’t too strong. “A beautiful pilot!” he said to himself. Who would have guessed?”

He looked out over the water next to the bar. He wondered if she would even show up.

In the distance he heard a faint Thwap-thwap-thwap sound and looked toward it. A helicopter was moving in low toward the bar. As it got closer he could see her in the pilot seat. She brought it closer to his position and kicked a rope ladder out the door. “Come on up,” she yelled, beckoning with her hand.

He took a deep breath and took a step towards the ladder. His heart was pounding in his chest.

As he climbed up the ladder, he could feel the wind whipping around him. He finally made it to the door and looked inside. The cockpit was small but cozy, with plush leather seats and sleek controls.

“Welcome aboard,” she said with a smile. “I thought we could take a little spin around the city tonight. Get to know each other a little better.”

He settled into the seat and fastened his seatbelt. The pilot revved up the engines and they lifted off.

As they neared the downtown area, she began to lean the chopper a little so Jeremy could see better. He leaned over a little more to see some kids kicking a soccer ball in the park when he felt his seatbelt loosen. She had unfastened the buckle.

“Nice to meet you, Jeremy! Good bye now!” Jeremy’s heart skipped a beat as he realized what was happening. The pilot was kicking him out of the helicopter! He scrambled to fasten his seatbelt as the chopper began to tilt to one side.

“What are you doing?!” he yelled, his voice barely audible over the deafening roar of the engines.

“I’m sorry, Jeremy,” the woman called out. “But I’m afraid you have to go. You shouldn’t have reported my boss for double parking.”

Jeremy tried to grab onto something, anything, as the helicopter tilted further. But it was too late. He felt himself slipping out of the seat and falling towards the city below.

For a moment, his mind went blank. He began to focus on his surroundings, scanning the streets and buildings below for any sign of a safe landing spot.

He spotted a large tree in the park. He quickly calculated the distance and trajectory, and aimed for the tree. With a deep breath, he adjusted his body and aimed towards the tree.

He hit the tree with a loud thud, branches breaking under his weight. He groaned in pain as he fell to the ground, but he was alive. He looked up at the helicopter disappearing into the night and shook his head.

“No goodnight kiss?” he said.