President Trump offers a “best-of-three” WWE event with The Constitution

“I’ve never heard of The Constitution,” Donald Trump told reporters this week, “but I’ve worked with my friends at WWE to put together a best-of-three wrestling competition available on Christmas for worldwide pay-per-view. Just him and me. We’ll see how good this guy is!”

Reporters explained The Constitution is not a wrestler like The Rock, but rather the founding documents that direct and guide the rights of Americans. A recent series of social media posts by the former President suggested he wanted the Constitution suspended for his own benefit, creating a firestorm of controversy across the country.