10 worst self-help books of 2022

The Power of Positive Thinking for Your Toenails: How to Transform Your Feet with the Power of Your Mind

Of all the things you’ve neglected this year, your toenails are surely in the top five. This self-help book teaches readers how to use the power of positive thinking to improve the health and appearance of your toenails.

How to Win Friends and Influence People in Your Dreams: A Guide to Lucid Dreaming for Social Butterflies

Are you introverted? No worries. Free yourself in your dreams. Learn how to use the power of lucid dreaming to improve your social skills and gain an edge in your personal and professional lives.

The Secret to Happiness: Just Eat More Chocolate

This tome argues the key to happiness is to simply eat more chocolate. It includes tips on how to incorporate chocolate into every meal, as well as delicious recipes for chocolate-based dishes. Includes chocolate waffles, chocolate popcorn, chocolate turkey sandwiches and chocolate stromboli.

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Goldfish: A Guide to Success for Aquatic Pets

You’ll learn how to apply the principles of effective leadership to your goldfish, helping them to live longer, happier, and more fulfilling lives.

The Art of Zen Breathing for Plants: How to Transform Your Garden with the Power of Your Breath

Have you ever been on a crowded city bus? Then you know the power of bad breath. This self-help book teaches readers how to use the power of bad breath to improve the health and vitality of houseplants. You might think it would kill the plants, but in fact the react by becoming stronger in an effort to survive.

The Self-Esteem Workbook for Dogs: Helping Your Furry Friend Build Confidence and Feel Good About Themselves

Learn the fine points of dog training to help your dog build confidence and improve self-esteem. Did your dog lose $50 in the last Super Bowl. Thee you dog things like, “Come on, Spike, you’ll get ‘em next time. The Browns look good this year!” They will cheer up and never trust you again at the same time.

The Power of Now for Your Phone: How to Declutter Your Digital Life and Find Inner Peace

This self-help book teaches you how to declutter your digital lives and find inner peace by following the principles of mindfulness. Mindfulness is important so you don’t leave your iPhone in your Uber and then fight with the driver to get him to bring it to your house.

The Joy of Decluttering Your Fridge: How to Transform Your Kitchen with the Power of Minimalism

This self-help book teaches readers how to declutter your fridge and transform your kitchen with the power of minimalism. Or at least, let’s get rid of that jar of mayonnaise that has been in the door shelve since 1975.

The Secret to Success: Just Keep Swimming

This self-help book argues that the key to success is simply to keep swimming, no matter what obstacles you may face. It includes tips and advice on how to stay motivated and keep moving forward. Never learned to swim? Don’t worry, it’s all covered in the first chapter “Learn to Swim by Swimming With Sharks.”

The Power of Visualization for Your Leftovers: How to Transform Your Meals with the Power of Your Mind

This self-help book teaches readers how to use the power of visualization to improve the flavor and nutritional value of your leftovers. Is that pork shoulder starting to turn blue? Concentrate! Concentrate! Oh my, it’s healing itself! Eat it for lunch, quick!