Trump allegedly shared nuclear secrets with golf buddies after leaving the White House

Sources report President Trump allegedly shared USA nuclear secrets with several golf buddies at his Mar-A-Lago club in Florida. But that turned out to be the tip of the iceberg. Here are ten other secrets Trump has leaked since leaving office.

Area 51: “You wouldn’t believe the intergalactic coffee shop they’ve got there. The Martian Mocha is out of this world!”

Mount Rushmore: “There’s a secret fifth face on the other side. It’s Nicolas Cage. National Treasure was a documentary, you know.”

The Liberty Bell: “It’s not really cracked. That’s just a zipper. Inside, it’s the nation’s largest coin bank.”

The Grand Canyon: “It’s actually a failed construction site for the world’s largest swimming pool. We just couldn’t find a big enough pool noodle.”

The White House: “The Oval Office? It’s only called that because ‘The Trapezoidal Office’ didn’t have the same ring to it.”

Statue of Liberty: “She’s hollow inside and doubles as a venue for secret government-sponsored raves. The torch? That’s the disco ball.”

Alaskan Wildlife: “Bald eagles? They’re just pigeons in wigs. We’ve been punking you all for centuries.”

The Mississippi River: “It’s not water. It’s America’s secret stash of diet cola. That’s why fish from there are so bubbly.”

The Constitution: “The original draft was written on a napkin. ‘We the People’ was just the header. Below it? A killer recipe for BBQ ribs.”

The Lincoln Memorial: “Abe’s actually sitting on a giant treasure chest. But no one’s found the key yet. I think it’s with Waldo.”