News

Headline Roundup – March 18, 2021

Good Morning, here are your headlines:
 
– DaBaby, Lil Baby and Bhad Bhabie Announce Late Summer Tour
– Man Tries Gorilla Glue Challenge on Cat – Paramedics Called to Pry Kitty From Regular Spot on Window Sill
– March Madness Announces Expanded Brackets Which Includes Pistons, Magic, Timberwolves and Rockets. NCAA Says They Felt Bad and Wanted Them To Have A Chance Somewhere
– Tesla Motors Announces New “Throwback” Electric Versions of AMC Gremlin, Chevrolet Vega and Ford Pinto.
– Republicans In Ten States Announce New Voting Restrictions Including Limiting Voting Hours to 210-220am
– At Honda Classic, Bryson DeChambeau Drives Green on Wrong Course Seven Miles Away
– Texas Rolls Back Rules Requiring Doctors and Nurses to Wear Masks During Surgery
– Biden Admin to Speed Up Vaccine Distribution With McDonald’s Drive-Through Plan
– Stimulus Bill Includes $49 Billion for Cuomo Defense Fund
– UK Biotech Firm Announces Eraseable Face Tattoos In Case Your Rap Career Doesn’t Work Out

Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel is a keynote speaker, humor writer, and really bad golfer. You can reach him via email at jditzel@yahoo.com as well as Twitter, Facebook, Google+ and LinkedIn.