Movies

Brie Larson BATTLES Chris Hemsworth in EPIC Wrestling Match (must hear!) [AUDIO]

 

Hello everybody! We are live from Las Vegas where Brie Larson is battling
Chris Hemsworth, Don Cheadle, Jeremy Renner and other members of the “Avengers: Endgame” cast in an awesome charity wrestling event at Caesars Palace.

Now a little backstory: there were many reports and analysis online about Brie Larson not getting along with the other cast members in interviews and other events.

So Vince McMahon of the WWE World Wrestling Entertainment saw an opportunity and set up this wrestling match and here we are.

Let’s go right to the action: Brie Larson is facing Don Cheadle in the ring right now. There are more than 20,000 fans in this standing-room-only event but it is being broadcast worldwide on pay-per-view.

Wait a minute. Larson has Cheadle in what looks like a version of John Cena’s “Attitude Adjustment” move. She’s got him up on her shoulders and boom! Down he goes! He is out like a light!

They are dragging Cheadle off. Wow, unbelievable guys. This action is unprecedented. Who knew Larson had these moves in her?

Now Jeremy Renner is coming over the ropes. He’s wasting no time.

He’s got her in the “Kill Switch Lock!” move and…down goes Larson!

Down goes Larson!

She’s stumbling to her feet now.

Hold it, she’s chasing Renner around the ring. She’s thrown him down now and she’s stepping in for the “Sharpshooter!”

She’s stepping in for the “Sharpshooter” popularized by Bret Hart!

We’ve seen it many times.

Oh! Oh! That is pain right there!

Renner is slamming the canvas in pain with his hand.

The referee calls it: Renner is done.

Larsen is now baiting the crowd. That’s two in a row that she’s dispatched rather quickly.

The crowd is booing as she raises her hands above her head, waving, pumping her arms. She’s saying, “Where’s my belt? Where’s my belt?”

And the crowd is not having it. They are booing Larson loud and long.

Oh, this is crazy.

We are not sure who is next on the list, wait, holy Toledo, Chris Hemsworth appeared without warning.

He’s climbing the ropes.

Chris Hemsworth is climbing the ropes.

Nobody really saw him approach the ring. But here he is — he’s climbing the ropes

He’s on the turnbuckle!

He’s standing on the turnbuckle and the crowd is going crazy

He’s one of the favorites.

This is just like Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka from back in the day.

He’s up on the turnbuckle.

He’s airborne! Hemsworth is airborne!

Oh, down goes Larson!

20,000 people or more are going crazy!

Oh man, Hemsworth hit her with the Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka turnbuckle move.

It’s pandemonium out here!

Larson is rolling in pain on the canvas. She’s rolling around — she’s disoriented. She’s trying to get to her feet, but she looks a little dazed.

Oh man, she is not happy.

But she’s got the eye of the tiger folks!

She’s struggling to her feet.

Now she’s grappling with Hemsworth, pushing, shoving — hold it–she’s lifting Hemsworth.

She’s got him on her shoulders.

She’s spinning now. She’s got him in the helicopter position! She’s spinning around faster and faster.

The spinning is so fast they’re actually lifting off the mat!

Spinning, spinning, spinning. Lifting off the mat.

Five feet.

Now ten feet in the air.

Twenty feet. They are rising above the mat, rising above the ring.

Fifty feet! Oh my, we’ve never seen anything like it.

And she lets him go!

She let him go!

Hemsworth is flying through the air!

He’s flying through the arena!

Boom! He’s landed in the upper deck. Way up near the roof!

Larson drops back down to the mat with a bang from fifty feet in the air!

Hemsworth hit the upper deck and was cushioned by the blow — he landed on a group of tourists from Iowa.

They cushioned the blow.

Oh, wow, wow, I can’t believe what I’m seeing.

Brie Larson just launched Chris Hemsworth into the upper decks of the arena. She’s dispatched three Avengers cast members in succession.

Well, guys, I don’t know what is coming next.

It’s pandemonium, it’s crazy, the crowd is going nuts. They can’t believe their favorite Avengers actors and characters have been roundly and very quickly dispatched by Larson.

Hold it–what’s happening now?

Here comes a stampede of the entire remaining cast of the Avengers franchise: actors, extras, even crew like camera operators and makeup artists.

They’re coming up in dozens and dozens — it’s wave after wave spilling up and into the ring.

It’s pandemonium out here. The crowd is losing its mind. The entire remaining Avengers cast and crew is battling Brie Larson. Everybody is taking her on. She’s fighting them pretty good, all at once, employing some Bruce Lee type moves to force them back.

This is crazy. This is going beyond wrestling. This is one for the ages.

They’re coming in waves. I’m not sure how much longer we’ll be able to continue coverage. They’re knocking over tables and chairs, coming from everywhere, from all angles.

They’re trampling around me, knocking things over, I’ll do my best to keep our coverage going but I don’t know how much longer I can keep it up…

 

Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel is a keynote speaker, humor writer, and really bad golfer. You can reach him via email at [email protected] as well as Twitter, Facebook, Google+ and LinkedIn.