Music

Did you miss Taylor Swift’s Eras Tour? Don’t worry.

What? You couldn’t pay the $300,000 ticket to see Taylor Swift at SOFI in Los Angeles. And you missed the Eras movie?

Don’t worry, fam. We got you. Here are even more ways to experience Taylor Swift magic:

Taylor Swift Scented Candles: Each one captures the essence of a song. “Shake it Off” smells like sheer determination with a hint of sass.

Virtual Reality Experience: Didn’t catch the concert? Strap on these VR goggles and suddenly you’re on stage with Taylor! But be careful, if you’re not prepared, you might just become her backup dancer.

Taylor Swift Cereal: Start your day the “Swift” way. Every bite takes you back to a song from the tour. And the prize inside? A tiny guitar pick.

Interactive Pop-up Book: As you flip through, a mini Taylor springs to life singing snippets from the tour. Perfect for bedtime stories!

Swift’s Meditation App: Guided meditations by Taylor, helping you find your inner pop star. “Breathe in, breathe out, and shake off that bad energy.”

Taylor Swift Workout Video: If dancing at the concert wasn’t enough, now you can get fit with Taylor’s signature dance moves. Break a sweat with “Cardio-gan” routines.

Dial-A-Song: Call a hotline and get a random song performance from the tour, perfect for those moments when you need a quick Taylor fix!

24-Hour Taylor Swift Eras Channel: A non-stop channel that chronologically plays music videos, interviews, and behind-the-scenes footage from every era of Taylor’s career. At 2AM? Relive the “Fearless” days. By noon? We’re deep into the “Reputation” phase.

TS Cruise Ship – “The Swift Sailor”: All aboard for a voyage through Taylor’s hits! With themed rooms for each album, nightly performances by tribute artists, and the occasional surprise visit from Taylor herself. Special activities include “Shake It Off” aerobics and “Love Story” ballroom dance lessons.

Taylor Swift Casino – “Swift’s Spin Palace”: Where every slot machine plays a T-Swift hit when you win. The jackpot? Tickets to her next concert, of course! And the house special drink? “Teardrops on My Guitar” tequila.

Taylor’s Mars Mission: Join Taylor and her crew as they establish the first concert on Mars. The exclusive “Red Planet” edition album features hits like “Blank Space…Ship” and “End Game (of Gravity).”

Swift’s Spooky Mansion: This Halloween, tour Taylor’s haunted mansion where each room is themed after a dark song or eerie lyric. Beware of the “Bad Blood” dungeon and the “Look What You Made Me Do” hall of mirrors!

Taylor’s Lunar Lounge: Why stop at Mars? Taylor’s moonbase is the ultimate retreat. Watch the Earth rise as you listen to an exclusive “Moonlit Melodies” album.

Taylor Swift’s Time Travel Tours: Step into a time machine and visit iconic moments from Taylor’s career. Ever wanted to be in the crowd during her first ever performance? Now’s your chance!

Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel is a keynote speaker, humor writer, and really bad golfer. You can reach him via email at [email protected] as well as Twitter, Facebook, Google+ and LinkedIn.