Joe Ditzel

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems

Comedy
Joe Ditzel

Jon Lovitz Comedy Club- Profile

“The Jon Lovitz Comedy Club features live stand-up comedy by some of the hottest national headlining comedians. The club’s 3 floors open to a perfect view of the stage and the casual tropical décor makes visitors feel as if they’re on an island vacation. In addition, the club also boasts a state-of-the-art sound and video system, as well as a full bar and gourmet menu. ”
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Source: CityWalkHollyWood.com
http://citywalkhollywood.com/nightspots/jon_lovitz_club.php

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Joe Ditzel

LocoLoboEvents.com

From the Site:

Locolobo Events- Your World Wide Booking Entertainment Mediator

Unique event entertainment is one of the most crucial aspects of events.

Locolobo Events can book for you the entertainment you want for your Corporate Event, Concert or Private Party. We specialize in all areas of live entertainment, have access to all national acts and can also achieve for your special event, comedians, speakers, sports figures, and specialty entertainers. Full service corporate event planning is another of our specialties. So whether you are looking for big name or local entertainers, LocoLobo Events will help you succeed.

LocoLobo Events service as a corporate entertainment booking agency, is a great way to put you in touch with a variety of many different Artists. We are here to work as your Talent Agent, to be the liason between you and an affordable routable talent or celebrity, and assuring you a successful and rewarding experience.
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Source:
http://www.locoloboevents.com/about.shtml

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Joe Ditzel

Time to Flip

MEACHAM: ‘Here’s what I suspect the future is: We’ve had it backwards. … We produce a magazine all week, we close it Friday and Saturday, and it begins to go out online … We have Newsweek.com every day, but [for] 77 years, the emphasis has been on the print. It’s probably time to flip that. In which you are solely focused on the digital, and by the end of the week you take the best of, and for people who want to hold a magazine in their hands – and there are people who can still do that … then you print that magazine. … This is an existential crisis – and it’s not just because … I feel incredibly strongly that this magazine for 77 years … has mattered unto the life of the country. It’s one of the very few common denominators in a fragmented world. … I think the country will be poorer for our disappearing. And the good news is we did not close today – we went up for sale.’

STEWART: ‘You’re like a personal Wikipedia.’

MEACHAM: ‘Which is gonna be good, ’cause I’m looking for work.’

– Newsweek Editor Jon Meacham to Jon Stewart on ‘The Daily Show’

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Joe Ditzel

Axis of Awesome- Profile

The Axis of Awesome is an Australian musical comedy act. The band’s members are Jordan Raskopoulos, Lee Naimo and Benny Davis. The trio cover a wide variety of performance styles, and perform a combination of original material and pop parodies.
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Source: Wikipedia
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Axis_of_Awesome

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Joe Ditzel

Class Notes

I graduated from Ohio University in Athens, Ohio. The university has an area on their web-site called Class Notes. Alumni can update their friends on what they’ve been up to since graduation. I eagerly entered my information:

Hello, fellow Bobcats! What a time I’ve had since graduation in 1983. During our graduation ceremony I was spotted by a modeling agency and whisked away for test shots in New York. I didn’t even have time to pay the $5,000 in parking tickets I had accumulated since freshman year.

Soon I was People magazine’s “World’s Most Handsome Man”, dating princesses and filling in as guest host on Entertainment Tonight Weekend Edition.

After 5 years of existing on cigarettes, I sat on the beach in Cannes and thought about my next career move. From the beach I could see a woman screaming for help as she thrashed in the surf. The lifeguard was busy ordering a baguette from a stand near the Palais de Festivals. I raced out to save her. At first she struggled. Then she realized who I was and relaxed while I dragged her to shore. I turned her on her side and 15 gallons of ocean water and 2 gallons of oil from the Exxon Valdez poured on the sand.

She turned out to be the mission director of a manned space flight to Mars. She believed I could help the mission because my high profile would be good for publicity. I trained for 1 ½ days and joined the Mars team. We landed on Mars, got out, and looked around. It looked a lot like Palm Springs. So we made arrangements to develop Mars into a planned golf community complete with houses with little garages for golf carts.

Seeking a new challenge, I had some fraternity brothers hack into the Ohio University computer and change all my grades to A’s.

Armed with a new GPA I enrolled in Harvard Medical School. We learned about the Jarvik Heart, the world’s first man made heart. Inspired by the story, I developed the Ditzel Liver. It was first tested on Ohio University seniors. However, it did not have the intended result. Equipped with brand new livers, the seniors decided to start over as freshman and party another four years.

And now, you too, can enjoy the benefits of a brand new liver. Just log on to www.ditzelliver.com and fill out the questionnaire. Your new liver will be shipped Next Day Air from our lab in my spare bedroom. You’ll get complete self-surgery instructions. In no time at all you’ll be back in the Dog Pound cheering on the Browns.

Thanks, Bobcats! See you soon!

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