Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems 14 – Book

Joe Ditzel Has Some Problems 14 – Book (2024 Jan-Jun)

• 10 alternative Dr. Seuss-style books
• When the ghosts of failed relationships return
• Trump and Biden to settle debate differences on the golf course for charity
• Hip-Hop square dancing is sweeping America
• Pump the brakes, Chad!
• Maccabees should have been in the canon
• Russian hockey players or characters from Gaston Leroux’s “The Secret of the Night”?
• Ron DeSantis and Mickey Mouse watch the Biden/ Trump debate
• Stanley Cup Corruption — Did Florida Fans Bribe Referees?
• The cat during her Bruce Lee phase
• The bump and the gaslighting
• Welcome to BearTender — Swipe right for roaring romance
• Comedy Coaster: The most masochistic entertainment at Six Flags Magic Mountain
• Taylor Swift’s greatest fear — finding true happiness with Travis
• In a Tribute to Recently Passed Willie Mays, Spike Lee Announces Hip Hop Musical Film “Mays,” Starring Jay-Z
• Tornados love the USA
• Headline I didn’t expect to see today: Neighbor sues homeowner whose WiFi he was “borrowing” when the owner added a password and denied him access.
• A tale of name-based snobbery
• I’m considering this for a back tattoo
• Big fun!
• Did the Celtics even want to play game 4?
• Wedding anticipation: A year-long layover in time
• Apple’s iPhone 16 introduces revolutionary ‘cone of silence’ to muzzle public speakerphone shenanigans
• The Battle of Bay Nine
• Headline I didn’t expect to see today: Giant python swallows an entire woman in Indonesia
• “SuperPigs” are wreaking havoc across North America
• That feeling when you spend the entire round in sand traps and mud bogs
• Aging is getting excited when your Fitbit shoots off little fireworks when you hit your 10,000 step goal
• Hey kid, have you ever flown in a plane full of bullet holes?
• Only in Wisconsin – hot dog boat spotted on Lake Pepin
• Pickleball ball hog
• The $7.7 billion second round of Biden student loans forgiveness is so good
• That feeling of relief when you’ve given up on your team for the season and can relax
• Scottie Scheffler Arrested at Valhalla Club After Using Rolls Royce as Golf Cart
• The Great Tractor Race Across Iowa
• Headline I didn’t expect to see today: Chinese zoo faces criticism after dyeing Chow Chow dogs to look like pandas
• Meowing like a cat
• Kickin’ ass and writing poetry
• Joe – By request only
• This is your captain speaking. I’m a little hungover.
• Eloise broke up with me because I said she was trying too hard to be cool with her daughter’s teenage friends
• Chloe dumped me because we were opposites
• That feeling when the monsters of ruined golf rounds past haunt you as you putt for birdie to break 80 for the first time
• From the pits of despair
• Alexandrea dumped me when I accidentally super glued her vegan cookbook pages together during my “craft beer meets craft glue” phase.
• How my apartment’s management turned daily chaos into a blockbuster experience
• Dive into faith: Introducing Rapid Baptism River Adventures
• Sparta spanks Athens, the Double Helix is announced, and Henry VIII introduces a new wife-swapping service
• A dog reflects back on his life
• Go ahead without me, guys, I’ll catch up with you
• Proud to be a lovely ape
• Pluto’s Broken Heart: A Celestial Body’s Response to Demotion
• The Supreme Court’s New Late-Night Legal Advice Hotline
• When she claims lunch with her personal trainer was just to discuss her “nutrition program.”
• Teeing Off with Justice: Your Next Golf Caddy Could Wear a Robe
• Advertise Here: The New Supreme Court Business Model
• When she just wants the date to be over
• Tbh, he’s got a point about the salt
• Clearing out the front door of the grocery store
• I guess they have their own building now
• When you trust your friend way too much
• The mysterious floating home of San Francisco Bay
• When you’ve got your tool bench set up just the way you want it
• Mikey the space mouse
• What I hear when Neil deGrasse Tyson explains how rockets take off
• When Bey lifted me in the air with her devil ring
• Biden administration to fight raging inflation by starting Christmas music in April to “boost morale.”
• Headline I didn’t expect to see today: Cops arrest California man for absconding with the leg of a person killed in a train accident
• The Hay Bale Balladeers – Two Spaces Big Truck
• The Netherlands battles senior loneliness with unique checkout lane solution
• I can give you a good deal on the balcony
• What if Trump runs to Canada?
• When an ex keeps coming back
• Flyover states: Des Moines doesn’t have an airport
• When you are new at relationships
• When you are about to break 80 for the first time and self-doubt creeps in
• 10 amazing facts about the history of St. Patrick’s Day
• Photo Op: Pelican Bobbling Races in Sarasota, Florida
• 10 shocking banned books
• New residents slowly realizing why Albuquerque seems empty
• Somebody call my phone so I can find it.
• Bad news: a comet is heading straight for us
• A movie’s title is crucial to its success
• Where’s my bow?
• Getting a tongue lashing
• Head full of dreams
• And add a lot of pepper
• I don’t care about what farmers want, I want my food
• Naked and afraid
• The Moonlighting Astronaut: A Gravity-Defying Claim
• The life expectancy of ancient Egyptians
• Photo Op: Kate Winslet and Ricky Gervais work on the new Golden Globes theme song, “Velvet Ropes and Vodka Shots.”
• How Not to Relationship, by Cathy and Heathcliff
• Please stop kicking so I can close the door to the cruiser
• Me after triple-bogeying four holes in a row on a par-3 course
• My password brain is on empty
• Announcing the Kitchen Comedy Festival
• Ketchup, mustard, and mental anguish
• Photo Op: Alien waves hi from Ganymede, Jupiter’s largest moon
• Fun fact: TSA rules allow you to bring a live lobster through security checks. Just not on a leash.
• Headline I didn’t expect to see today: On-duty police officer in uniform arrested for shoplifting at a sporting goods store. Taken to police station in their own cruiser.
• BREAKING: Coachella implements surge pricing at festival outhouses. Electric Daisy Carnival and Bonnaroo expected to follow.
• I can’t wait for driverless cars
• You should put that on a car wrap
• Some of my clothes are so old they were trendy 25 Madonna facelifts ago
• Copper bracelets like the Gods of yore
• Is Phineas Gage the toughest guy who ever lived?
• The great cosmic junkyard
• The flaming nostrils of Denmark: A beacon of human achievement
• When you can’t stop thinking about all the things you have to do tomorrow and can’t sleep
• Introducing ‘The Retaliator’: the ultimate solution to combat blinding headlights with a reflective twist and heavy metal
• Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift Crown Themselves King and Queen of Kansas City
• Getting ready for the next pandemic
• My confession: I faked research results for my masters degree
• Calling all Jamies to Bourbon Street
• From Tokyo to touchdown: Taylor Swift’s high-flying halftime show
• When the gang piles in the car but it refuses to start
• Some Super Bowl fun facts and rather dubious ones as well
• The Taylor Football League: Swift’s Answer to the NFL
• 49ers fan coming in hot
• Zodiac Forecast: Horoscope of the day – Feb 02, 2024
• Prophecy from 79 AD revealed by AI
• Track List Leaked! Every track of Taylor Swift’s new album!
• What’s the use? The handles break off as soon as I put the bags in the car
• NFL announces new team: The Swifties, owned by Taylor Swift
• 10 signs you’ve eaten at IHOP too many times
• The new IHOP gift emporium: A pancake lover’s paradise
• 10 signs your neighbor is running a ghost kitchen out of their garage
• 10 signs you’ve picked the wrong dog
• 10 signs your therapist isn’t very good at their job
• Trucker baptism
• Taylor Swift – Kelce and Me
• 5 of the longest-living dog breeds in the world
• Taylor Swift – You Belong to Me: Lyrics Explained
• Headline I didn’t expect to see today: Man partied on unaware he had been shot in the head four days ago
• Taylor Swift Joins Kansas City Chiefs in Unprecedented Draft Move
• Self delusion and weakness of spirit
• Son, did you mow the lawn?
• In and Out: YOLO
• 10 outdated phrases that make you uncool
• 10 things girls crave in the bedroom but will never tell you
• Crazy characters of LA: High speed cycle with soul
• In and out: Throwing shade
• Crazy characters of New York: Wall street money pillow
• It fell from they sky and we ran like the dickens
• In and Out: That’s my jam
• Elon Musk launches “UnderTheDeskTech”: the ultimate solution for workaholics’ wilderness dreams
• 5 fantastic movies, directors and actors that didn’t get nominated for the 2024 Academy Awards
• Watch out for the claws
• 23 random fun facts that make you wish you didn’t get rid of Netflix
• The oldest tourist attractions in all 50 states
• Don’t mess up this opening scene
• What’s Pluto been up to since his demotion to dwarf planet?: The Pluto interview
• Snow shovel apocalypse: Buffalo Bills fans drop out of the sky to help team in record snow fall
• What your favorite planet says about you: A guide to your personality
• The Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms explained
• 10 strange dog breed and hat combos you won’t believe
• 10 curious dog breeds you’ve never seen
• 10 signs your New Year’s Resolutions are not going well
• Little known iPhone feature: Scroll the keyboard with one finger
• Mariana waved goodbye when she noticed my hair was dropping out quicker than a narcoleptic at a lullaby concert
• “Mean Girls” is back again? Cue the endless sequels
• Alaska Airlines’ unique compensation offer: Free hair blowouts for a door-less flight
• The top 10 guitarists of all time: Unsung heroes
• Crazy food delivery instructions: The strange tall figure in the woods
• 10 most livable small and midsize U.S. cities
• Better be home by 11
• See you later, alligator
• New details released about the part that fell off a United flight in the middle of peanut service
• TV still from “The Walking Dead: Retirement Years”
• Joey Naps is back!
• 5 chilling haunted houses in New Orleans
• 10 effective ways to deal with loneliness
• The top science fiction movies of all time
• Google Maps caught me on the sidewalk in Los Angeles dancing to “Footloose”
• I wore this when the Ohio Players were hot
• Never fall in love with your corporate overlords
• Hippie on a Harley
• Man, it’s cold out here
• Ian Ziering attacked by animals on Hollywood Boulevard!
• Talk to a real New Yorker and live to tell the tale
• The spectacular collapse of 2023’s biggest bankruptcies